Hectic

Upon writing the title to this blog I decided to be philosophical, I looked up the definition of 'hectic' and I was returned with this: feverish: marked by intense agitation or emotion; worked at a feverish pace. So it would be reasonable to say that feverish is the synonym to hectic. There I embarked to define feverish and rendered this result: having or affected by a fever. So I became confused. If A infers B, B infers C then A should infer C, but wait...that doesn't make sense. So I stopped.

Now to the real post, this week has been in so far the most hectic week of the semester if not the year. Week 5 of uni, a backlog of study to be done that rivals the length of the Great Wall, the Sunday School play is up for show this Sunday and props must be finalised. As conventionally done, I'm the interpretor for the principal during the service when its Sunday School Sunday and his report rocked up to my email inbox this morning.

The flu season has taken its toll, the paralegal today fell victim as the 4th casualty of our firm. Me being the only member left yet to be plagued steps up to take two jobs for the week, court documents to be drafted for 4 clients, 2 sets of disclosure to be copied and sent to the Defence, whole weeks worth of filing and a tired mind.

A few new contacts that may add to the continously dormant fellowship need to be contacted and encouraged, both done today. Doubtless it gave an extra edge of confidence to my commitment in ministry. However more headaches come the way of chasing up and getting attendance finalised for camp and Youth Alive from people at uni and other branches of society.

Karl just tells me he's going away in 5 days, duty calls to fare him well. Obliged to organise something. URGENTLY.

Housekeeping matters continuously trek the back of my mind. Rainwater tank rebates, Father's Day gifts, auto insurance...

What helps now is that trick monkey magic uses, he pulls a strand of hair from his body, blows into it and POOF! 72 more monkies start the job.

A restless mind, out~/

Belonging

Week in, week out, I labour to bring revival to this fellowship. I've seen all too much of the strife and tension that cripple the foundation of God's most vibrant and energetic ministry. Am I the one to change it? I was so sure about it last yr, was sure about it last month. Now, I trust in that no longer.

Perhaps it was God's intention that I see the fragility in my own abilities, but my zeal has lead to disappointment. How each day I dedicate my life to Him, but the ministry remains dormant, maybe its time to move on. Maybe its God's will that a lesson be learnt here. Did Paul end up convincing Corinth to move on and revive? I have not searched the answer to that question, but I am not Paul either.

2yrs I've been facing this dilemma, do I just capitulate and leave, join one of the number of Youth ministries more suited to me (CCCB, Hope Brisbane, ICC, EMP methodist) or do I linger and take the initiative to bring revival. Can I really make a difference? Time after time I sought comfort from the above Bible verse in Psalms, time after time I listened to the song "I want to run to the alter and catch the fire...we will make a difference bringing hope to this land."

I think its time to move on and stop lingering in the past, even if just for a break. All this yr of burden and intuition is exhausting. I'm going to say that at least for now, I wish to leave Sherwood Methodist and follow in God's plan for me wherever it may be.

My King!

How great is our God!

Testify to love

Our duty to God in a most poetic fashion.